---
lastmod: "2021-09-12T22:47:44.0000000+01:00"
author: patrick
categories:
- creative
comments: true
date: "2013-10-20T00:00:00Z"
aliases:
- /creative/the-ravenous/
- /the-ravenous/
title: The Ravenous
sidenotes: true
---
[Once upon a midnight dreary][1], while I pondered, weak and weary,  
I required a snack to feed me. Reaching in the kitchen drawer -  
With the scissors, cut the wrapping, I revealed a jar of tapen-  
Ade of olives. Gently snapping, snapping off the lid, I saw:  
Lines of mouldy olive scored the tapenade. The lid I saw  
Speckled with each mocking spore.

How the pangs of hunger rumbled while I cursed the jar I'd fumbled;  
Indistinct, I faintly mumbled, "May this torture last no more!"  
Suddenly I saw the bread bin; eagerly towards it edging,  
Bravely to my stomach pledging, pledging food would be in store.  
Opening that sacred vessel, only crumbs were left in store.  
Savagely the bag I tore.

Now my thoughts turned to basmati; I would make a dish quite hearty,  
And my shattered brain was party to such plans of starch galore.  
Trembling I imagined sauces rich in spice and such resources,  
Gripped by these enchanting forces, opened I the cupboard door.  
Slavering, excitement mounting, opened I the cupboard door;  
Rice stocks were exceeding poor.

How my stomach needed filling. Dreams of pancakes gently grilling  
Served to give me eager willingness to find a bag of {{< side right flour-footnote `flour.`>}} Pronounced "floor". {{< /side >}}  
Happily it was not lacking. Took the eggs out from their packing,  
Fetched a bowl, and in it cracking, cracking eggs so batter'd pour.  
Tipped the milk (blue top, full-fat) in, mixing up so batter'd pour.  
Sugar I could not ignore.

Took out oil, and put the gas on. Measured out a goodly ration,  
Ladled it in practised fashion, spread it thin, my movements sure.  
Round the edges batter bubbled, far too quiet. The heat I doubled;  
Soon I'd be no longer troubled: hunger'd bother me no more.  
Oh, to be no longer troubled, hunger both'ring me no more.  
Crêpes: a food which I adore.

Tested I the pancake, dipping fish-slice in to start its flipping;  
Grabbed the pan, towards me tipping. "Now be cooked!" I did implore.  
In my eagerness to turn it (lest I tarry and I burn it)  
With such horror I discern it: I had dropped it to the floor.  
Ah, with terror I discern that I had dropped it to the floor.  
Quoth the pancake: "Nevermore."

 [1]: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Raven "The Raven Wikipedia page"